NaPoWriMo - Day 13 - Ventilation

Yesterday's prompt was "write a poem consisting entirely of things you'd like to say, but never would".  Sounds like another excuse for a good rant.

Maybe I'm getting bolder in my old age, but I wouldn't hesitate to say any of these things, given half a chance.  

VENTILATION

Something I would love to say to George W Bush:

- Is English your first language?

Something I would love to say to anyone who is thinking of becoming a politician:

- What makes you think you can make a difference?

Something I would love to say to the UK Treasury:
- If Inheritance Tax really is fair, then why doesn't the monarch have to pay it?

Something I would love to say to the dedicatee of Wishful Thinking:

- How can you sleep at night?

Something I would love to say to the father of the dedicatee of Wishful Thinking:

- If only you’d worn a condom…

Something I would love to say to anyone who drives a Chelsea Tractor:

- Did you trade in your brain when you bought that?

Something I would love to say to the person who designed the car park at my local Tesco:

- The charitable explanation is that you don’t actually drive.

Something I would love to say to the person who redesigned the local branch of my bank:

- Come and try it sometime, when you have several hours to spare.

Something I would love to say to the CEO of BT:

- Why aren’t your call centres located in Britain? (BRITISH Telecom – the clue is in the name...)

Something I would love to say to the guys at Apple:

- Why is your hardware so cool whilst your software is so crap?

Something I would love to say to the publisher of FSOG:

- Why was this published, when much better work has been turned down?

Something I would love to say to a cold-caller:

- Two words, the second of which is “off”.

Something I would never say to anyone:

- Because I say so.